It slowly dawned on me what I'd done as I placed the gun on the table. I watched my hand move slowly away with this strange and heavy object. Stretching out away from me as in a déjà-vu experience. My hand still tingled from the shock which the small gun had sent smashing through my whole being. My ears ringing, I dared not turn around, knowing what lay on the ground behind me, but at the same time a sense of fascinated horror caused me to slowly turn and grasp what my actions had caused.